Each and every week in 2014 I diligently scoured Twitter for the very best gaming-related tweets. Except for the weeks when I was too busy, I mean. Or when I just didn’t feel like doing it. And also yourstandard.us didn’t exist for the first quarter of the year, so I wasn’t really doing it then either.
But aside from those minor exceptions, I have been an omniscient Uatu the Watcher focusing specifically on the intersection of funny Twitter people and topics vaguely related to gaming.
It’s a sad, lonely life.
Anyways, here are the ten funniest gaming tweets of the past year, more or less.
— Bortfirio Díaz (@crushingbort) September 4, 2014
NOT NOW BABY I’M BUSY.
Vaulting over graves and paying respects at funerals were just two of the wonderful new gaming mechanics introduced in 2014.
yourstandard.us’s Rudy wasn’t the only one who had fun with Kim Kardashian: Hollywood this year.
Enter Command: > CHALLENGE GRANDMA You challenge Grandma. Grandma flees! You have earned 45 XP. You found SOUP. You found WIG. — jon hendren (@fart) July 23, 2014
Defeating your grandma is the first step towards becoming a true champion.
In Super Mario 3, Mario kills Bowser’s sons one by one until he recovers a kidnapped girl. It’s basically Taken with slightly more turtles. — Rob Fee (@robfee) July 25, 2014
“I have a particular set of skills, including jumping, breaking blocks, collecting coins, sometimes throwing fireballs…”
Saw a picture of Mario and Luigi kissing one another online. Please do not do that — Shigeru Miyamoto (@RealShigeruM) April 24, 2014
Unfortunately @RealShigeruM isn’t the REAL Shigeru Miyamoto, but this tweet is still gold.
Yes, it’s quite odd that Kim Kardashian showed up twice on this list.
video games are cool because they let you experience fantastical power-fantasies. for example in The SIMS you have a job and a house. — lawblob (@lawblob) April 13, 2014
I personally prefer games which are a bit more believable.
Your cat’s stuck in a tree? I’m a gamer, ma’am, I’LL HANDLE THIS *chugs Mountain Dew, complains on forums about trees being overpowered* — Brian Gaar (@briangaar) July 25, 2014
Not only did Dr. Gaar have the single funniest gaming tweet of the year, he was also far and away the overall champion in terms of gaming-related jokes on Twitter, and appeared in our Tweets of the Week feature way more often that anyone else.
Here are a few more of his top gaming tweets from the past year:
A guy in my WoW guild had to quit because he lost his kids & quit his job so he could play. We were stunned because his gear wasnt even good — Brian Gaar (@briangaar) September 10, 2014
When I was a kid the only video game publication was produced by the largest gaming company. And its ethics were that all of its games ruled
— Brian Gaar (@briangaar) November 21, 2014
Son when I was a kid, we didn’t have iphones and video games, we had to use our imaginations. It really sucked.
— Brian Gaar (@briangaar) November 15, 2014
Girl what’s your favorite pokem … THAT’S A DIGIMON, THEY’RE TWO COMPLETELY DIFFERENT GAMES, YES I WILL SHOUT IN THIS RETAURANT
— Brian Gaar (@briangaar) August 6, 2014
Just turned on Animal Crossing after several months, the townsfolk were killing each other for food & worshipping a variety of pagan deities
— Brian Gaar (@briangaar) July 17, 2014
Therapist: Now who do you think “Bowser” represents in that story you just told? Me: No, I’m actually talking about Bowser.
— Brian Gaar (@briangaar) June 23, 2014
Congrats to Brian Gaar on being the 2014 Prime Minster of Video Game Comedy on Twitter!
If you see a tweet that you think deserves a spot in next week’s Funniest Gaming Tweets of the Week, let us know by sending it to @yourstandard.us.
Check out previous installment gaming tweets of the week here.